The Cost of Always Being “The Strong One"

Being the strong one sounds like a compliment. You’re reliable, composed, selfless — the one others go to when their world is falling apart. But somewhere along the way, you forgot how to ask for help yourself.

You might be the eldest daughter, the high achiever, the first-generation child who grew up fast — someone who learned that your needs come last. That vulnerability makes others uncomfortable. That if you cry, things will fall apart.

Here’s the truth: strength without softness becomes survival. And survival isn’t living.

You don’t have to carry it all. You’re allowed to set boundaries, rest, and even fall apart sometimes. Healing means unlearning the belief that your worth is tied to your ability to hold everything together.

Being strong isn’t about never breaking — it’s about finding the courage to rebuild, softer and wiser each time.

So if no one’s told you lately: You’re allowed to put it down. You’re allowed to be held too.

Posted by Brain Healing Practice

If you’ve ever felt like you’re “falling behind” in your healing journey, you’re not alone. We often picture healing as a straight path — one with milestones, clarity, and progress we can track like checkmarks on a to-do list. But healing, especially from emotional wounds, doesn’t move that way.

Some days, you’re calm and grounded. Other days, you’re overwhelmed by feelings you thought you already worked through. And that doesn’t mean you’ve failed — it means you’re human.

For many of us raised in households where emotional expression wasn’t encouraged or where survival took priority over self-awareness, unlearning shame, guilt, and perfectionism is deep work. And deep work doesn’t follow a deadline.

Here’s what healing actually looks like:

• You’ll revisit the same wounds with new understanding.

• You’ll feel triggered by old patterns and learn to respond instead of react.

• You’ll start to speak to yourself more kindly — even if that voice is quiet at first.

This is your reminder that your healing is valid even when it’s messy, slow, or uncertain. Progress isn’t about never falling — it’s about how you meet yourself when you do.

Take a breath. You’re doing better than you think.